I am Hispanic, and I grew up in the worst component of Albuquerque,
New Mexico (USA), where Each sides of the railroad tracks, have been the
wrong side to occur from. Just three doors down from the railroad
yards, which absolutely everyone understands that railroads are
hazardous, filthy, and noisy areas!
The neighborhood was mostly fitflops
Hispanic and Black, and it was a place in which fear dominated! I lived
in this dreadful neighborhood for fourteen a long time of my daily life,
and throughout this time, I was often searching in excess of my
shoulder, which was a way of daily life for me! Gangs drunks prostitutes
drug dealers skip-suits winos beggars and hobos who would jump off the
trains and comb the neighborhoods for foodstuff and income! Other than
that, this was a nice place for a younger kid to develop up!
Throughout
this time in my daily life, I didn't talk the English language well
(nonetheless don't), and due to the fact of this, I experienced to find
out how to talk the language at a youthful age. I spoke a mixture of
English and Spanish, which was called...Spang-lish...and, I made up
words as I went alongside.
When I was fourteen, my family members
moved out of this black hole, and into the heights of Albuquerque, where
the housing division was named \"Snow Heights.\" And, snow white it
was, as it was primarily a White community, and coming from a primarily
Hispanic and Black community, this was certainly a tradition shock for
me! Youngsters can be rude and hard, when it happens to teasing, and
kids teased me all the time, since I did not speak English properly.
So,
talking Spanish was place on the again-burner, as I experienced to
concentrate on studying to converse and publish English. But, being able
to understand and communicate Spanish, has constantly been of benefit
to me. The most terrible issue about not speaking English nicely, was
when I experienced to participate in a course dialogue or give an oral
guide report. I was devastated the very first time discount fitflops I received in front
of the course and did a e-book report! Children had been sneering and
laughing at me, and this would have an influence on me in the long term.
The dilemma would plague me throughout center college and high school
Thirty
day period by thirty day period and 12 months by 12 months, I would
listen to other people converse, and I realized from them how words had
been pronounced. I wished to learn to speak and compose the English
language as nicely as I could, but I understood it would be a difficult
street. Writing the English language was not so challenging on me, since
only my teacher would see my operate, and so forth.
Numerous
several years afterwards, when I was in my forties, I took and finished
two writing correspondence programs, and a inventive creating class at
the College of New Mexico, to attempt to enhance my writing skills. I
wished to pursue producing in the potential and to create content and a
book I am doing work on. Writing is some thing I can do right up until I
hang up my tennis shoes, and computer systems nowadays make it
significantly easier. By completing the two composing courses, it gave
me self-assurance to put up my internet site without having hesitation,
and so forth.
In composing my ultimate paper for one of the
correspondence courses, I wrote a spoof on the English language, and it
was rejected by my instructor. My instructor has a Ph.D in
communications, almost certainly enjoys the published phrase, and
apparently he didn't come across anything at all amusing about the
piece. I happen to be in the humor business for forty a long time, and I
locate the English language humorous at instances...when spoken and
written.
When youngsters develop up and discover to communicate
the English language, it can be hilarious! An example, was when my son,
Jason, was developing up and he was about three or 4 a long time
outdated, and I'll share with you how he spoke and destroyed the English
language all by himself. Maybe, you will come across a number of issues
amusing about how he talked back then. For example:
The phrase
\"cereal,\" Jason would pronounce it, \"sillio.\" The name of the
metropolis, San Francisco, he would pronounce it, \"Sanchez-frisco the
phrase \"watermellon,\" Jason would fitflops sale pronounce it, \"meller-mellon.\" The
phrase \"helicopter\" would be pronounced, \"hoptercopter.\" The words
\"Christmas tree\" would be pronounced, \"mimis tree.\" The words
\"potato chips,\" would be pronounced, \"chater chips.\" The previous
television collection, Startsky and Hutch, would be pronounced, Starchy
and Hutch. If somebody would mow the garden, Jason would get in touch
with it, \"lawnmowring.\" As an alternative, of Jason declaring, \"I
want somehing to consume,\" he would say, \"Me want sompin to wink!\"
Jason, not only destroyed the English language, but he would make up
words as he went alongside.
* * *
How can I seem up a term in the dictionary, if I don't know how to spell it? Webster, aid me out!
* fonetic Where did you find out to spell, Jer? The phrase is spelled, Phonetic agreeing with pronouncing.
* Zerox (duplicate device) : You spelled it incorrect, Jer. The word is spelled, xerox.
* Filladelfia fillies: Sorry, Jer...the words are spelled, Philadelphia Phillies
* numonia Mistaken once again, Jer. The phrase is spelled Pneumonia
* Just a reminder, Jer...your faling the speling bee. Shame on you!
* New Jersey: How is it pronounced? New Joisey. (Spell it like it seems)
* New York Once again, how is it pronounced? New Yolk
* Spell window, Jer. In the south, it really is pronounced \"winder,\" so I would spell it like it sounds.
* Plummer Wrong again, Jer. The word is spelled, \"plumber.\"
* Boston: In Massachusetts, the town is pronounced, \"Baston.\"
Have you at any time visited Baston?
* Pill: in the south, the word is pronounced \"peel\" and spelled the very same way.
* Texas In Texas, this term is reversed and is pronounced, \"Taxes.\"
* Taxes: In Taxes fitflop australia, this term is pronounced, \"Texas.\"
* Door Spell it like it seems. In the south yet again, this term is pronounced, \"Doe.\"
Will someone close that doe?
* Filibuster incorrect...the term is spelled Philibuster
*
SLANG: Why do not we add a little slang to the language to spice it up a
little bit. airhead baby-boomer barf bazillion biggie bod bonkers
booboo booze bread (cash) brewsiki shut-eye cheesy cool(excellent) couch
potato foxy hunk dorky el cheapo fender-bender flaky flick (film)
freebie geek go bannanas. Shake your groove-point! It really is 10:00PM,
do you know wherever your groove-factor is? Shake your booty. Do you
have a booty to shake? Do you have a birthday fit? What's the skinny?
Place is a box. Hang it on your ear. Sit on it! You created your
bed...you slumber on it!
* You don't assume the English language
is screwy? Consider a search in you are medicine cabinet! Medications
you cant pronounce or even proper ...compose? omeprazoie furosemide
metophrolol losartan buprepion. (P-l-e-e-z-e!) I will not know how
anybody can grow to be a farmacist!
* Cathy Kathy Carol, Carole,
Caroll Gerry, Jerry Ann, Anne, Betty, Bette, Jo, Joe Terry, Terri
Cheryl, Sheryl Bobby, Bobbie Judy, Judi Kelly, Kelli John, Jon Billie,
Billy (Allow me see...exactly where did I set my prozak...or is
it...proxac...or is it...prozac...or is it...prosac? I am acquiring a
nervous brakedown! Breakdown fit flops on sale? Which is it?
* Do your personal
issue: In the south, it truly is pronounced, \"do your very own thang!\"
So, if a man or woman in the south spells this word as it sounds, the
phrase \"factor,\" would be spelled, \"thang!\" Write?
Wright
correct ceremony dear deer doe dough...(Whew...I'm acquiring a
headache!) Have you at any time created someone a Deer John letter? You
know write from incorrect, rite?
I assume you can guess why Dr.
McCollister did not settle for my final paper, even though the paper did
not look like this. He's from Arizona, and perhaps he isn't going to
have significantly of a sense of \"Yuma!\" (Get it?) In closing, I have
only one particular term to summarize the English
language...S---Do---R---E---E---E----E----M!!!
Posts Published: (70+ sites/consists of back links) Immediate website
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site identify: humordoctormd - Over one hundred fifty colourful pages
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humordoctormd@yahoo.com Copyright Jerry L. Aragon (The Humor Physician)
2006
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